How can I do it all? What should I tackle first? How do I prioritize tasks? Argh!
These and many other questions pop up daily for working parents. We asked our colleagues about how to be a successful professional and a great parent at the same time.
What does it mean to be a good parent?
Being a good parent is about much more than just providing for your child's basic needs. It means being active participants in their lives, supporting their interests, helping them grow, and being a reliable source of support during tough times. Andrii Bohatyi, Head of UA, emphasizes caring for a child's physical needs and helping them become independent and confident.
“Our children are lucky to be growing up in the modern world. Today, there's a wealth of information, books, and courses on how to raise a child without traumatizing themselves or them effectively. It really works, especially with 'difficult children.' So, I often find understanding my child easier than solving work problems. However, comparing these two areas – work and family – isn't easy. My relationship with my child is me as a parent, while work is me as a specialist. At work, it's impossible to organize everything so that no problems arise, but with a child, it's easier. Actually, working in performance marketing, you're engaged in solving problems; that's your job. It's a characteristic of our industry that tends to change dynamically. I can say that 4+ years of parenthood have greatly improved my stress resistance and ability to remain calm in difficult situations, which helps me at work." – Andrii Bohatyi.
Vitalii Sukhomlyn, a young father and Unity Dev, shares his understanding of parenting as a constant process of learning and self-improvement. He believes that every child is unique, and what works for one may not work for another. Therefore, it's essential to be attentive to a child's needs and create an atmosphere of love, protection, and support.
Katerina Maliaran, a mother of two and Head of AdMonetisation, believes that being a great mom is about creating happy memories for your child, taking an interest in their life, and helping them achieve their dreams. She emphasizes the importance of communicating with your child and understanding their needs.
What's harder: work or parenting?
Burny'ians almost unanimously agreed that both work and parenting have difficulties and challenges. Working in game development requires a lot of time and effort, especially when building a release, fixing bugs, or preparing a quarterly report. Parenting can also be challenging, especially when a child is fussy or needs help with homework late at night and you should stay calm and friendly.
However, as Andrii Bohatyi points out, parenting develops resilience and the ability to stay calm in difficult situations, which is very helpful at work. Vitalii Sukhomlyn emphasizes the importance of communication with your partner, planning, and task prioritization to combine work and family successfully.
Katerina Maliaran believes that with a normalized workday, it's possible to find a balance between work and family if desire exists:
"Every parent will face a situation at midnight where a child needs to make a craft or a presentation for school the following day. This happens regardless of age. It happens with my son, who is 7, and my daughter, who is 16. I have countless instances of myself searching the park at night for dry leaves or sand for crafts for my little one. My older child can come at night and turn my room into a workshop of geometric illusions made of cardboard because she couldn't finish it independently for some reason. Refusal is not an option. You dive deep and help."
How do you feel about children being present on work calls?
All teammates agree that sometimes the presence of children on work calls or meetings is unavoidable, especially working from home. They understand it but emphasize the importance of warning colleagues and stepping away if the child interferes with the work process.
"I'm okay with it. My wife and I work from home, so sometimes the child might be nearby during a call or sitting on my lap if it's the younger one. It's tough when daycare closes on a workday or the nanny can't be with us. However, if the child is no longer a baby, it's usually not difficult to find a way to distract them during the meeting, as the presence of children can distract colleagues. You have to understand that your child is primarily your responsibility," says Andrii Bohatyi.
How to do it all?
The secret to successfully combining work and parenting lies in communication, planning, flexibility, and prioritisation. It is important to discuss the division of responsibilities with your partner, plan your time and tasks, and be prepared to change plans on the fly and adapt to unexpected situations.
"Balancing family and work can be compared to juggling balls: it's an art where you need to focus on all the balls and give each one energy and direction. If the ball called 'work' falls, it can bounce back like rubber, but in the case of family, it can shatter into small pieces. In this case, the key is communication with your partner, planning, and task prioritization, both for household chores and work tasks. So, feel free to ask for help when you really need it to focus on the things that are truly important at certain moments. Life with children is often unpredictable, so it's important to be able to change plans on the fly and adapt to various changes. On weekends, I always spend time with my family, fully dedicating myself to them without distractions from work," says Vitalii Sukhomlyn.
What are the OKRs of a happy child?
A happy child is a child who laughs, enjoys life, knows how to communicate with peers and build relationships, and can recognize and express emotions. It's essential to create an atmosphere of love, support, and safety for the child so that the child can develop harmoniously and feel happy.
"Happy parents = happy child. So, it's the love and attention of happy parents. And happy parents are those who don't lose themselves trying to be the best for their children. Everything else is a nice bonus. We all grew up in the 90s, and what children have now is hard to compare to what we have. But few would say their childhood was sad; the love and attention of our parents made us happy," says Andrii Bohatyi.
So, there's no magic formula for being a good parent. Our teammates shared their personal experiences and strategies for balancing the joys and responsibilities of both worlds. Whether it's finding creative solutions for late-night school projects or understanding the occasional interruption of a child during a work call, Burny'ians embrace the beautiful chaos with grace and understanding. Above all, the consensus is clear: happy parents nurture happy children. The key to unlocking this happiness lies in finding balance, cherishing every moment, and embracing the unique journey of parenthood.
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